Monday, June 21, 2010

today started out ok

update on this pan -- it's still soaking beside the sink

I hate this pita bread recipe! I know it's the first one I've found that's even come close to producing an authentic Greek pita, but you know what? I don't give a damn. I hate eeet!! Working with it is a nightmare. A. Night. Mare.

I have a few favourite favourite parts from this recipe that are so impossible to achieve, it's actually quite funny:
"...knead with your hands until the dough pulls away from the sides of the bowl." haha good luck with this one!
"Divide into six pieces and roll out..." eeeeeeheee!  Lightly touch the outside of the dough with your hands and it will immediately fasten to your skin. Then pull until you get something I would describe as a 'wad.' Leave your rolling pin in the drawer. There's no need for more dough casualties.
"Dust both sides [key word here] lightly with cornmeal..." take a cupful of cornmeal and dump it on the counter, then take whatever damn wad you managed to get, and roll that sucker all around and in, making sure to cover it completely with cornmeal. Then start patting the dough into something resembling a pita shape, all the while patting more cornmeal on and pushing it onto the dough. Then do the same thing for the other side.

I've tried the recipe in it's original form with the KitchenAid. I've tried it with less water. I've tried it with more flour. I've tried it again exactly as written. Nothing I do makes it right. Sorry. But this recipe is bullshit, and I'm not making it again. I'll find a better one. Also I'm never making anything from that stupid website ever. again. Thanks for never responding to my question about it while still managing to tweet every half hour, stupid.

And why do you figure every ziplock bag you pull out of a box is already sealed shut? Why? So I have to desperately grasp and fumble with the damn thing trying to get it open while my hands are covered in chicken slime? Is this some cruel joke? Does this make ziplock manufacturers laugh? -- maniacally, probably.

And there is too. much. crap. on. this. desk. and. I'm. super. annoyed. about. it.

And if I catch whoever keeps knocking over my planter full of lettuce, I keel you, too.

1 comment:

Lindsey @ Hot Polka Dot said...

It wasn't me! I swear! I had the exact same problem with a ziplock bag and chicken slime last night. Bags are meant to be filled with junk. Why do they assume that's not your intention? Jerks.